Reputation is everything in the South. Everyone is so concerned with whether or not they're "good people" and that they're from and currently creating "good families". I've lived in several states in the South and there are so many people that are utterly obsessed with how they're perceived in their community. Are they in good standing with the church? The school system? Do they individually know all of the members of the local Board of Education? When they walk into City Hall are they ignored or feared? How many family members of theirs are in the police force? The list goes on and on. I have a sneaking suspicion that this toxic mindset is where the idea that someone could "ruin their witness" came from.
Picture this- a much younger, less cynical, me in Sunday School on a sunshine-y Sunday morning being told that I shouldn't associate with people that aren't Christians because it will "ruin my witness". The person telling me this was the Sunday School teacher; a woman that I loved and respected. I had been attending that church for several years and like everyone else I referred to her as my "aunt". Her marriage was good. Her family was decent. She has three sons that I'll still say hi to if I see them out in public. She was actually related to several people in the church. She had been the Sunday School teacher that everyone liked for God knows how long. She was the picturesque example of "good people". Yet she sat there in her chair in the middle of the room and talked about how the world should see us and how it might get the "wrong impression" if we're seen with the wrong people. Who were the wrong people? People who did drugs. People who had sex outside of marriage. People who drank and cussed and smoked cigarettes. People who didn't dress in their Sunday best every day. People that weren't Baptists, (it was a Baptist church). If they didn't know Jesus they didn't deserve to be looked at. If they weren't Christians they didn't deserve anyone's time of day. My Sunday School teacher was someone I trusted with teaching lessons that were Biblically correct. Without bias. The words coming out of her mouth that morning were opinion ladened lies.
I looked around at her three sons and my other friends in the youth group. I looked at the chalkboard walls I helped paint with my best friend on a hot summer morning. I looked at the things my friends wrote on the walls. The prayer requests. The funny faces. I looked back at my "aunt". I knew she was lying. I don't think anyone else did.
I grew up rather unchurched. I hated Christians. I hated how fake they were. I was a very angry kid. Twelve years old and I was walking around, cussing like a fisherman. I was rude. Hateful. I was picked on a lot in school so one of my friends "taught me how to be a bitch" and I evolved into the bitchiest twelve year old that ever existed. Then one of my other good friends invited me to her church.
I met Jesus and I remember just bawling. I can't describe fully what I felt. Relief. Love.
According to my Sunday School teacher though, that friend of mine shouldn't have even given me the time of day. I didn't grow up knowing Jesus.I didn't go to kid's church. I didn't go to AWANA. I didn't go to Vacation Bible School either. Even after I got saved I didn't attend a church regularly until I was thirteen. I didn't even get baptized until I was fifteen. (Let's not start a salvation/baptism war here people).
What if my friend had been afraid that I would ruin her witness?
Ideals like that completely discount Grace. Jesus could not have given a rat's smelly behind about who He was seen with. He hung out with twelve smelly dudes 24/7. Fishermen. He didn't hang out with priests or faithful churchgoers. In fact, Jesus went out and always ended up hanging out with who the
religious folk of that time thought were the bad people. The
undesirables. The twelve smelly dudes He hung out with did things like ask permission to call down fire upon a town, cut people's ears off, even act like they had no idea who Jesus even was. Like they hadn't just hung out with Him for three whole years. Yet Jesus loved them despite their shortcomings. Despite their stench. He knew them all quite well. Their faults. Their fears. They were His twelve. He chose those people.
He chose us too. All of us. He died for every single one of us. He died for all of us because we're human, which means we all inherently suck. You suck. *insert Oprah meme* And you suck. And you suck!! And you. You too- I see you there shaking your head. You, my friend... you suck. We all suck which is why the need for Grace was so dire. We're all murderers. Liars. Thieves. Adulterers. Even the pastor of your church. Even the deacons. Even the Sunday School teacher you thought could do no wrong. We never stop needing Grace.
So I challenge you, anonymous reader, to remember Grace. I know the whole "ruining your witness" thing is a widespread ideal. I see it on Facebook. I see it on Twitter. I see it everywhere. I even see it creep up within me every once in a while. Remember that Jesus came and died for all of us. Regardless of your past, or even your future. None of us are good enough on our own. As for your "witness"... if you're carrying out the job that Jesus appointed all of us to do, if you are loving people, let it be ruined.
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